Tuesday, September 28, 2004

If only we were nicer to each other....

Lately I find that the ppl in sg are getting worse, how you ask? They are getting more uncaring, more rudfe to each other, more selfish...etc I think if everyone took a minute to be nicer to each other, we wun be so grouchy all the time. Lets face it, how many of us take the time to smile at a familiar face you see all the time but do not know? how many of us actually say thank you and mean it to some one [providing you a service or such?

I think our country is dixindling into a cold and heartless society. Well.. its getting to be like New York here, if fact worst than New York. Lets say if a person falls down, be it a child, man , lady, ah peh, ah ma, dog, cat...how many of us actually take time to bend down and help this person. If a person drops something, will you help pick it up? Sad to say ard 70% of us will just look the other way. Why is it soo hard to do something nice for a change? Until we need to have a campaign that have to encourage ppl to be nice to others.

I guess we are so caught up in this rat race that we loose wad is truely impt to us, our heart and soul. We have all turned to cold, selfish money grubbing idiots. When someone bumps into another, instead of teh usual sorry, you here grunts....like we are some sort of aniimal or somthing. Great Sg spent all that money to build infrastructure and schools, so that she can educate her ppl to grunt at each other when they bump into one another. Much as well stay a caveman eh?

Just yesterday i almost got into yet another accident, I was coming onto an expressway, and I was filtering in front of a lorry, so I did my usual chks blind spot and all, as I filtered, all of a sudden a car that I could not see at that time came form teh third lane into the lane I was going into and was on a collision course into teh side of my car. The damn BITCH got the cheek to horn me(she was coming from behind me) and did not even swerve to try to avoid me. I was like in the lane 3/4 of the way leow. WTF man... I had to avoid her and miss her. But you know teh beauty of teh story? The lanes infront of me and her were clear for at least 400m.

So I wonder to myself, shld I have just let the bitch ruin her new car on mine, to teach her a lesson? but I think it is not worth it, as I have been in an accident b4. and teh wait to get the car back is one wait I can do without. I find this fucked up behavouir more evident in rich bastards/bitches, to them its only money. They never spare a thought about anyone but themselves. I hope their children get rape/killed/sold as salves/wadever mean, to bring them down a few notches back to earth, where a bullet will kill me, you and Bush the same.

Friday, September 24, 2004

Woman that hang and sell....

Was At newsroom again on wed to celebrate a certain firy bird's hatchday. B4 they arrived, i was seated at the bar beside 2 ladies, though neither was that good looking to warrent me to even get to know them., I was bored. I found myself asking for the name of one of teh gals. She gave me her name but brushed me off saying ssomething in the lines that she is not interested or so. Which i could not make out due to teh loud music.

Later in the nite as it progressed, I found myself on my usual platform, gyrating to the intoxicating music withmy friends. Then the 2 gals that earlier rejested my advances also came up to join us on one of teh lesser platforms. I even caught the one that bruched me off smiling at me. Which at that moment I had no more intend to get to know these 2 nutcases.

I just dun get it, why do women like tto play these childish mind games. I guess I am this way that if you reject my advances the 1st time round then the boat has left the dock. If you try to entice me lter on again, then all you gonna get form me is scorn. I gets they just love the attention given to them by dumb men chasing/worshipping them. But then again, I am no dumb man...

Also a gal that I got to know teh 1st few weeks of come back to clubbing was at NB too, she saw me dancing with myy friends(guys and gals) n decided to sms sarcasit smses to me, asking me why I did not say hi to her. As earlier when she asked me if I was going down to nb and I asked if she missed me that is why she sms me, she told me to wait wait long long for her to miss me. Yet she asked me to go over to say hi to her and when I did, she flirted with me trying to get me to be interested in her again.

Why do they love these attention seekibng games? I mean the 1st few times I toked to her she never got close to me nor wantedme to get close to her. That nite when i was having fun with my friends, she came up to me asking for hugs and even kissed me. She also commented that teh gals I hang out with are pretty young, which gave clue that she felt threaten by younger gals. Its like a big cat fite or how my rabbits vie for my attention at home. When I give this particular rabbit attention, she runs away, then I start to play with the other rabbit, she will come to me at my feet and look at me as though telling me that I can only touch her and no other rabbits.

I can only say one thing.....WOMEN!!!

Tuesday, September 21, 2004

Creeping feelings and reflections

Last nite I had some tau huay supper with 2 lovely ladies that accompany me to geylang for teh soya treat. They were discussion certain life n death issues while i was lost in my tau huay. Deep down inside, i still think of the gal in my dreams.... I keep wondering if I will ever meet her again.

I ask myself why do I bother to sms someone whom doe snot seem to know my exsistence, not even a simple I am fine reply. I guess i must attribute my chance meeting with her to the 7th month, and thus will have no such luck in future. Yet I still stalk the place in hopes to meet someone similar or even she herself there. Its funny why i am doing this at all. I mean I am more logical than that to pursue a airy tale rite?

As teh rain ppoured down, and while I was driving thru it, sonngs played on teh radio seemed so familiar, like it was telling me a story, or giving me advices, or just consoling me at my despair. My mind drifts, but I snap out of it, as it would cause a road accident if I do not concentrate. I meet women in my everyday surroundings all tehtime, yet, I still cannot find the one I want, the one i long for.

I guess I have to con't this lengthy road to search for somethingthat will never happen. They saya dream only comes to you once, yet I want to find this same dream again desperately. Well its funny whenever it rains, it affects my mood, I have always been attached to the rain, maybe my most dispairing moments are in the rain. Well good thing is, that tml is ladies nite, another wed, another week to hope for her then.

Monday, September 20, 2004

The effects of chicken Teriyaki Don

In the morning as I was reaching my office carpark, I saw this gal I seem to always bump into, sems like some sort of sick fate I have with her. I drove past her looking at her. She too paid a lil attetion to me. At the lift lobby she said hi 1st, I responded with my uaual cool self and murmured a hi back. as we walked towards the office buildings, she reached her office 1st and then again said bye to me, I in return had to return the greeting. Though I seen her countless of times, I did notknow her at all, well at least not on a 1st name basis. Thus I was rather politely shocked when she said hi to me today.

Also she being a gorgeous slim tall and everyman's dream type of gal, i would least expect her to even pay attention to the likes of me, let alone say hi to me. Thus I am puzzled why she even took note of my exsistence which puzzled me further.

Lunch tiime after a long crazy chat with someone online, I took a crvingto chicken teriyaki don, which led me to make wy for teh arts canteen, and on the way, I bumped into 'her' again. Is this fate? She looked at me, and gave one of her sweet smiles that I can melt into and all I can do was to return her with a half smile that I somehow mustered out. Damn I am bad with these things.

Later while having my meal, I overheard some student sayingthat how marriage is like the last step in a r/s. i was like wtf....I mean I tot I was naive, boy will they be disappointed.Which brings me to this point, my mom's god dotter sent her wedding invitations last nite to my place to invoite my whole family.

I ggot history to this gal, well the fact is she was 1st my gf then became my mom's gawd dotter. She also stayed in my home for 3 yrs, thus in effect during that time it was sort of a cohabit....well so, now it come sdown to this, to go to an ex gf''s wedding, it will be so weird for m, so I am opting iout of going. I will feel weird seeing a gal I used to date marrying some other guy. Thus I think I will save myself teh dispair and stay home to watch something on tele.

Thursday, September 16, 2004

This caught my attention

While in some philosophy lecture, the lecture read out a slide he was show. "....it is good to be selfish and it is good to be selfless as well..." I shot out of my seat and had that WTF l;ook on my face. I mean, how the heck does one be selfish and selfless AS WELL. It all feels like crap being pulled out of the ass when I heard those words. But he is a lecturer and thus, I guess this is why philosophers are so, confused most of the time.

Also as I was online todayI noticed more and more SPSed dickheads are invading teh internet. All so eger to inpress some bitch in irc, just becoz she is the only gal chatting, and puting down teh other guys in the channel. So that they look so almiighty and smart, dun these assholes know that the bitch sittting behind that pc most liklely is some poor fat bitch that no one wants to date and gets her kicks from guys insulting each other to vie for her attention.

It makes you wonder when did so many humans, fall down the stupid tree and hit every single branch. Esp when they got this concept that they will get laid by the so call bitch. WHy dun they get off their butts and get out of their home sto get to know soem real gals, instead of flooding teh IRC mains with senseless rants and adverts that get no where?

Wednesday, September 15, 2004

Things I heard during lunch

Yesteray while having lunch with my bag(read as eating alone) I was sitted next to 2 guys and a gal. NUS have tables that are so close together I wonder why they bother to seperate them. Why do I say this, well the gal sitting next to me got up a few times, and I had to siam my head from her ass a few times too. The worst thing is that that at one point of time she stood up and looked ard for her other friends, which in a way, swayed her ass almost hitting my head not once, not twice but a three times, had I notice that fat ass coming my way.

I very much wanted to tell her to sit her ass down. Well they were toking about karma and all that they beliob that they dun do bad things to ppl, thus bad things will not happen to them. And I tot I was naive... Anyway, as they said that, the gal, stated some bitchy gossip about some gal they knew. She was saying that this gal is so bad that even a bastard like (lets call him dick) siamz her.

She was going on about how bastard this 'dick' is and yet he does not want anything to do with that gal. Thus I am baffled, if they beklibed in kkarma, and they are bad mothing someone whom is supposed to be their friend, wun that be bad karma? Oh well I digress.... Another tot I had is about the guy she called a bastard, she said that he was one becoz he has the finance and looks to be one, does that mean that all rich and handsome men are bastards? Sour grapes anyone?

Then she went on about point oput that one of the guys with her whom was better looking than the other, can be a bastard as he got the looks, while the other protested saying. like that you insulting me lor. In a weird friendly way. Anyway I just could not help but think that this gal is just pull shit out of her ass. Everyone knows its a vicious cycle, the bastard and teh bitch, one cannot exsist without the other.

Its simple,

Guys become bastards, how?

Nice guy meets bitch, bitch plays nice guy, nice guy becomes bastard

Gals become bitch, how?

Nice gal meets bastard. Bastard screws her over, nice gal become bitch

And the cycle goes on and on and on........

Thats just life manz, it sucks and there is nothing we can do about. Well sometimes no matter how hard you try to change what you are, you never seem to escape your fate. So why bother? Everything exsist for a reason, and everything that begins will have an end. Why care or digress so much, just enjoy the ride and see where it leads to.

Tuesday, September 14, 2004


I wanted to blog, but I accidently erased wadever I was typing her for the past 1 hr and now its gone... I no mood leow.....

Friday, September 10, 2004

Wads wrong with this world???

People killing people, all are mother's sons, why does it happen? These are the things in my mind today. Just read about the bombings in jakata. I dun understand why do ppl claim jihad and easily just bombsome building all in the name of jihad. WTF I say, I think these ppl just like to kill an dtook any stupid reason they can think of to kill someone, anyone.

Me I think they just lust for blood, thus they join such groups that give tem access to kill others for some reason, any reason. Why can't we just live an dlet live, instead or resorting to blowing each other up.

If it ever happens to sg, I guess all hell will break loose. Think of it, a bomb going off somewhere were expats gather, say boat Quay. Man that will be like so many casualties. I guess there will be nuts out there that just like to do harm to others. Iys some sort of power they feel when they take lives easily.

Which brings to a point of why we lik eto hurt others in the things we do, be it friends or ppl you just met. if only we were nicer to each other inteh world, I think every thing will work ouyt better. Wars will no longer exists, greed and such will become a distant past. Well we can't do much about lust though.

You think its far fetch, well it is far fetched if you think that way to begin with. if you a s an individual can be nice to other ard you then maybe this niceness miight spread? Then ppl will stop hurting each other.... Far fetch you say, why dun you try it for a few days and see if things ard you improve.

Thursday, September 09, 2004

Commenst a bit hard? I know

I was told that this blog shitty spot comments section is as full of holes in its program as a piece of cheese. I must say I am sorry for the deal I got for free blogging and all and dun think I can do anything about teh commenst bar allowing easy posting of comments. still I will see if I can get a sort of a tag board up for you ppl to post comments on.

Also I am damn tired, well sleeping at 5 am and waking at 630 am has its toll. Why dun I ever learn?? Will try to get some proper shut eye tonite then.

Wednesday, September 08, 2004

Its Ladies nite!!

Yup its wednesday again, and tonite is ladies nite. Being that it is still 7th month, I wonder f ppl bothered to go out at all. Anyway, I am sure no matter wad, the temptation of free alcoholic drinks is too much for many of the hardcore partiers out there.

Also today I feel free today, like a bird out of a cage. Remember for the past few nites I have been visited by this weird bitch in my dreams? Well the nite befor ei told her to fuck off and guess wad, she did. I also all of a sudden stop obsessing about her. I feel I can go out an dpiant the town red again, if not for my 730 am schedule tml. Well I will see how.

For all the ladies going out tonite, well have a good one and remember to use a condom!!

Tuesday, September 07, 2004

So you know.....

that recently my head feels like sewiss cheese in a grinder for some weird reason, and teh attribute to it is some gal appearing in my dreams for the past few days. Last nite I decided to do sometime else, in my dream I decided to tell her to fuck off and that seems to screw the whole dream up. The ending was different, other things happened, she ended going home with a old classmate.

Dun know if you can actually control your dreams or not. Sometimes I wonder if we are dreams of an actual person whom is sleeping while we are awake and when we sleep that person is actually awake. Thus that explains why you sometimes are more tired after uyou have done to bed. Ok I did say my mind is weird didn't I?

Well back to my story now, so since i have chnaged the content of my dream, which happens exactly teh same for the past few nites and ends teh same way, will it mean that I will not have it anymore? I hope so, cos I am about to call IMH to reserve my usual sweep if things do not progress well.

I usually do not think or brood over such minor things, so having this felling of obsession has really took me in a rather surprising fashion. I know I dun do desperation, let alone obsession, yet I still see this face every daysince, well less today, which seems to be a goo dthing. Anyway it leads me to think if someone has incanted a spell over me and thus I am actingteh way I am.

I know I am more logical than that, erver since I lost my ex, I have decided to leave my emotional side of me in a little place I keep unnder lock an dkey in my head. I have yet to open that tiny room in my head, for hell will break loose if I did. I know I will do irrational stuff.

Not that any of my current friends will know of my past emotional swings and craziness i put them through. Anyway I think I am much better now than b4, I guess the bastard and bitch theory finally caught up wiith me. That is that I am more of a bastard now than ever b4.

On a side note I did manage to finally start work on my last plane, the tail fins are finally one, well sort of, I will work on it to take my mind of things for a while.

Saturday, September 04, 2004

Unatural behaviour

Something is definitely wrong with me. For the pasy 3 days?nites I am haunted with this certain fac ethat I cannot seem to get out of my mind. I loose sleep an dappetite over it and I have no idea why I am so obsessed with this particular face that seemed to have etched its way into my mind.

A friend of mine commented that i did not look too good last nite and asked me to snap out of it as soon as possible. I too want to snap out of it and this seems so weird that I do not have any control over this. I am usually more logical that this and will usually discount it as some weird fanttasy I long to have, yet I find it hard to believe that it is that simple. Being teh 7th month now, I can't help to feel something in the unnatural sense is going to happen. Yet by rite I had never believed in these superstition in my life.

Last nite, at the dinner table, I felt weird, I was hungry and yet had no appetite. I really need to find out why I am so obsessed with this face that is in my mind. Is it some warning or similar, or am I too sceptical at this point.

My friend is rite though about a certain comment she made last nite, that I did not want to agreed with her at that time, and its eating into me. I need to snap out of it. Someone pls take a hammer and give my head a goo dwhack. Thanks

Friday, September 03, 2004

Ego boost?

Times have changed and in the past I always tot that only guys with (small) penises needed ego boosting. Though its nice once in a while to have an ego boost or 2. I recently noticed that even gals needed that, an ego boost to themselves by throwng themselves at guys and wanting the guys to react positively to their throws. Especially when a gal is in a emotional roller coaster with a said cyrrent bf. She tends to do dumb things to get the attention form a guy, well any guy so that to assure herself that she is still needed in this world.

Then when she is satisfied that she still has it in her, she totally lets the guy go off in his own emotional roller coast ride. After pondering a bit I now understand why there are so many bitches and bastards out there. Well it simple, it is sort of a chain reaction that starts with a person whom seems devoid of feelings and this person starts by hurt those ard him/her for his/her selfish gains. Thus those whom are hurt goes ard hurting others as they feel that they need to exact some sort of sick revenge on others to satify themselves.

Thus the cycle goes on and ppl get hurt and they in turn hurt others. Maybe thats how thge bitch and bastard cycle works out. B4 I go off topic with this and crash it into a wall, lets get back to the topic at hand of ego boosting.

Why is it so that we tend to do silly things justto boost our own ego? Be it you race with a dick head that cut you off on the road to out dance some shumck you just cannot stand dancing on the platform and gaining all the attention of the gals/guys or even fliirting with a guy/gal you just know with no intention of keeping in contact teh day after. For me I have seldom or never try to boost one self ego justto get something. I rather not do such a silly stunt in case it back fires and I will inturn be shamed from it.

I always think humans are silly creatures with mind bewildering habit that tend not to make sense more than anything. What about the rest of you out there, do you engage in some sort of self ego boosting just to make sure that you feel like you are the top dog? or do you sit at the corner and watch the world go by? I like to think of me as different sometimes, like a person that no one notices in a pub or bar and sits in his own corner to have his drink while watchingthe world go by.

I know... I am strange as a lot of ppl have told me many times. But I guess we all have to be unquie at some point of time.

Thursday, September 02, 2004

Newsroom and the 7th month

Well as you know ever since the semester here started in NUS, my life has been hell and had no time to go down to newsroom on wednesday due to the fact that the next day my day starts at 730am and ends at 9pm. Heck I dun even have time to come here to update my blog.

Anyway lets con't about newsroom. As I have been deprived for teh past 3 weeks or so, I really miss the fun times I had the last few weeks. Thus I had to just go down to look at how things were going for nb during the 7th month. I was not too shocked to see that the place was similar to a ghost town even at 1030pm and not many ppl was ard. I sat at the bar nearer to the other end and towards the dance floor.

I was surprised by the fact that the waitress I asked about if she felt cold wearing so less a few weeks back actually remebered wad I always order and ask if I wanted the same. I had already ordered my drink by then and told her its on the way. I wanted to only stay till 1130 only since I had a long day the following day. But somehow fate likes to play with us and always mess up oyur plans.

Lets just say it was a very fun nite i had though none of the ppl I always go with turn up. Anyway I guess its only a one time thing and I wished I could have gone back to last nite and changed a few things. I guess we cannot never have our cake and eat it. But I did enjoy most of teh nite anyway. Also to the gal I met last nite, thanks for the nite it sure brigthen my gloomy week even though I know that would be the last I would see you. Thanks anyway.

Tml I most likely will have to go down to newsroom again to meet Shervon and see wad she meant that it was a different feeling at nb. Also Harold, a waiter I got to know last nite, promised that he intro his friends if I went on fri nite. We will see how.

Yeah lastly, double O was as crowded as usual even though the 7th month had beseiged newsroom and mdm wong. But I cannot help to think that the comment made by a friend of mine that stated that the place is getting sleazier is actually true. I did witness a lot of semi drunk gals letting guys whom they dun seem to know fondle them. Talk about cheap thrills... I guess i dun go for such stuff as I dun think I am that cheap a guy.